Cupidity by: Suzanne Shield-Polk, Ceramic with encaustic wax and collage, 2010.
Particarly Cognizant
by: Robert Delaney
RE: Aware of your own genius? Take our quiz!
Dear Administration Personnel for the Institute of Genius Intelligence and Research
First let me start by saying how much I value your inquisition of my person and particularly my mental capabilities. As an educator, I personally enjoy the daily benefits of having a learned mind and a scholarly life. Unfortunately, because of the particular job I have, my knowledge is reserved for the minds of third graders, so I seldom receive appreciation for my full potential. In my younger college years (before I married my husband, Bob, almost 18 years ago), I followed a particularly promising path to be a registered nurse which would have allowed me to flourish my talents, skills, and knowledge to their full abilities, but that unfortunately ran short, and I was left to pursue a career as an elementary school teacher. My husband, Bob, has a very important job as a supervisor of a small construction company, and although I am aware that he is indeed a wonderful husband, he has become more focused over the past few years towards a particular construction project that his firm is in charge of. Naturally, I have felt somewhat overlooked recently, so this acknowledgement of my achievements from your organization is greatly appreciated.
Now, I don’t want to portray any ungratefulness or impatience; I do understand that it has been only a week since our last correspondence via e-mail, and I am aware that there is a particular order for which all shipping and distribution of parcels must go through, but I wish to inquire a time frame for delivery so I know when to be expecting the goods I have requested, so I can arrange my schedule around their arrival. I have acquired another daytime profession throughout the summer months; I am a care provider at a local summer day camp where I help watch over and counsel the youth until I go back to work for my elementary school in the fall. Since my husband, Bob, has the car for the next few weeks (he is attending a training retreat with his new assistant, Brenda), there will be nobody to drive me to the parcel post after I get dropped off from work, so I would like to know, if possible, what particular day the previously mentioned packages should be expected so I can make my arrangements.
I am aware that the Institute’s time is valuable, and I will wrap up this e-mail quickly now, but I do have one more inquiry. After the particular researcher from the research department contacted me via e-mail, and after I took the online examination to confirm the researcher’s results, I was presented with a digital certificate from the Institute of Genius Intelligence and Research, and was awarded platinum status which put me in the top percentile and allowed me to purchase the deluxe package. I am aware that this package is particularly remarkable, and I understand that the $374.86 I spent for this particular package covers the cost for the once a quarter publication of the Who’s Who book that my name will be printed in with platinum text, but I am curious as to what the rest of this particular package includes. My husband, Bob, who is a very wonderful husband, was inquiring information about the Institute and particularly the deluxe package. I could not produce to him that information as I had forgotten it, and also, for some reason the Institute’s website is down. I explained to my husband that the deluxe package’s extras weren’t significant and how this achievement was particularly important to me; he told me that he understood, but he also said that such a purchase should have been consulted with him first. He is the man of the house, and I do realize that even though he has been particularly busy with work and with his new assistant, Brenda, all of our finances should be finalized with him. That being said, between you and me, I’m not so sure he is aware; unfortunately, sometimes my intelligence goes overlooked in my husband Bob’s mind. Nonetheless, I find it easier to appease him than to debate such particular issues like this, so producing my inquired information would be much appreciated.
With my husband, Bob, being so busy the last few years because of his projects, and especially most recently with training his new assistant, Brenda, I have been feeling particularly unacknowledged, and it has become somewhat difficult to flourish my intellect. I understand that my husband is very busy, but I am also aware that he is a wonderful husband who cares and sometimes even tries to spice things up (I recently found some skimpy lingerie he bought me, although he accidentally got the wrong size because they were too small). That being said, I do appreciate his effort, and I am a patient being, but I still feel overwhelmingly unnoticed; thus, it feels good to know that there are other people besides me who are aware of and recognize my genius intellect. So, thank you again for your acknowledgement of my achievements, and I look forward to hearing back from you on these particular inquires.
Sincerely,
Debbie Baker